I'm a dope...

I watched Britney drive around and around the courthouse live on tmz.com. What's worse? I actually got a little thrill out of it. And even worse? I felt cheated when my stream got cut off and I couldn't see her actually go in! I'm so ashamed.

Who? Matthew? Was I supposed to be watching him? Oh, I think he was off playing in the knife drawer or something.

6:10 am

"It's 6:10!!! I WANT TO GO DOWN THE STAYERS!" (she drags "stairs" out to at least 2 syllables...hey, she's from Texas!)

And so another morning begins. Fortunately I've already gotten ready, since this is the usual routine. Get up at 4:30 when Sharon's alarm starts going off. Get up every 10 minutes for about an hour when her snooze alarms go off. At 5:45, after she's out of the shower, take my shower and get ready. Read until 6:10, at which point Ellie calls out.

Once I get into her room, she points out that "it's now 6:11." Thanks.

This morning there was a twist. She was laying in bed while I was getting her clothes out, and we had this little conversation:

"Ellie, did you get a good night's sleep?"
"Yes. I was picking boogers after I got up."
"Oh. What have you been doing with them?"
"Smashing them."
"Uh, where?"
"In my hand. Whenever you pick boogers with your fingers, you ALWAYS need to wash your hands."
"That's good advice, dear."

At least she's learning about hygiene, right?

Ellie vs. Judas Priest

We were listening to the radio during dinner last night, and "You've Got Another Thing Comin'" by Judas Priest came on. In case you aren't familiar with the chorus (and I imagine you aren't):

If you think I'll sit around as the world goes by
You're thinkin' like a fool cause its a case of do or die
Out there is a fortune waitin' to be had
You think I'll let it go you're mad
You've got another thing comin'


After the song, Ellie said "If they say 'you've got another thing coming,' you say 'NOOO! I don't WANT another thing coming!'"

Now how can she understand those lyrics so well, but I can't get her to listen to one thing I say?

A Memo

To: People who read and walk at the same time
Re: You are stupid

Dear Sir(s) and Madam(s),

You can do many things while you read, but despite what you think, walking isn't one of them. I know you like to show everyone how smart you are by reading Nietzsche while you're walking down the street, but trust me, you can't possibly concentrate on both walking and reading enough to properly do either.

And when you can't see around the book you're holding at eye level and step off the curb against the light, almost causing an accident in front of me outside the Clarendon Metro, I just think you're an idiot.

Love,
Me